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Fear. It’s a regular, powerful emotion. But real ‘fear’? Real fear is going to sleep each night being unsure if you’re even going to wake up the following morning. Real fear is being so terrified about the future and what lies ahead that you believe ending it all is better. safer. Real fear is being so scared of the demons in your mind, of yourself, that you believe dragging a blade across your skin or numbing the pain through pills is better. Real fear is waking up the morning after last nights desperate contemplations and actions, petrified of the following day, disappointed that a tedious alarm woke you up instead of a blinding, all-consuming light. A light that you believe will take away your pain. That is ‘fear’. My fear.
My 1am thoughts (via paralysing-sadness)
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